Welcome to the new Navitent!

Start:May 18, 2022

Duration:10 Minutes

Goal: this Cognitive Trail will improve the ability to make friends who bring out the best in you (Your Peeps).

Description: 'Your Peeps' is the 3rd in the Next Step series that give specific, daily guidance that leads toward friends and confidantes who help trekke ... Read More

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Published By:

JP NextStep

Summary:

Step 1

Hi!

How are you doing? Seriously, how are you doing?

Step 2

Today's challenge is a continuation from yesterday.

Take the steps necessary to distance yourself from someone who's steering you away from your goals. That person may even be that part of yourself - your own insecurities - that prevent you from meeting new and positive friends.

Whether it's a real person or a part of yourself, that first step takes place in your mind. What you're going to do is to mentally follow the process through to its logical ending.

It's like this: Think about the fact that if you agree to do this and follow through, then you're stepping away from a person and your own doubts who are compromising your future. But you're positioning yourself to outsmart your insecurities and meet people who are for you and not against you.

Get a mental picture about what that could look and feel like and describe what you saw and felt below.

Step 3

While you experience some conflict in making the decision, if you felt freedom and relief after picturing what your life would be like without the doubts or the negative person, then it likely was the right decision.

Think of it this way: Picture yourself sinking in quicksand. Now get an image of yourself being rescued from certain death.

That's what it feels like to leave behind doubts and/or a bad friendship. It's freeing. Leaving is like being rescued from catastrophe.

How much did this image speak to you?

Step 4

How do you follow through for real?

Take what you gained through those mental images and use them as a source of strength and courage.

What you're doing may make you feel a little awkward or even guilty, but don't let those thoughts prevent you from doing what's right.

You may need to consider your own mistrust about people as if those thoughts were a 'person, a negative influence' if you don't have a real person you need to break from.

Real person or mistrust, whether they meant to or not, this person was blocking you from the life you were meant to live. So were your doubts. Maybe you had some good times as things were. Maybe they were there for you when you needed them. Maybe not.

That's beside the point. You're at a cross road.

To take the path to freedom and the life that is meant for you, you have to leave behind people - and thoughts - who can't or won't go with you or who would prevent you from going at all.

The other path is to remain with the person who doesn't care about your future and suffer the consequences. Doubt and mistrust offer the same bad outcome.

It's that simple.

Which path are you going to take?

Step 5

If you said yes to separating from negative influencers, then don't forget to ask an older, wiser friend for encouragement.

You already have our friendship through these navitents.

It's vitally important to follow your path with someone who can guide you in the right direction.

Why?

Because guilt and insecurity have a way of creeping in to undermine your resolve. You'll need support to hold firm on your decision.

The biggest mistake you will make in life is to think
* you're alone
* that you'll always have to do things on your own
* that you owe that person your allegiance
* that you have to trust your mistrust

Remember the quicksand analogy. It'll help you stay strong.

As for being alone, keep in mind the Testudo philosophy - overlapping shields.

Will you contact someone older and wiser to help you remain strong?

Step 6

Let us know how things go.

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