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Start:May 17, 2022
Goal: this Cognitive Trail will improve the ability to make friends who bring out the best in you (Your Peeps).
'Your Peeps' is the 3rd in the Next Step series that give specific, daily guidance that leads toward friends and confidantes who help trekke ... Read More
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Today's steps begin with a music video. Go to the video icon and watch 'Level Up'.
Let us know how the message landed with you when you've finished.
As you probably guessed, the song is about people breaking through trust barriers.
The issues could be relational, difficult situations, physical challenges or anything that makes you feel 'less than'.
The video urges us to let our guard down, trust one level up and grow closer as a result. There's a caveat here. The advice applies to people who your spidey sense says 'you can trust this one.'
Where it concerns connecting to people who appear open, honest and positive, courage is going to fuel the ability to trust them. It's about having the courage to be vulnerable enough to let people get to know the real you.
How confident are you about letting someone get close enough to discover who you really are, especially when something deep inside you says they are trustworthy?
How confident are you that you can allow them to remain in your life long enough to let your guard down one level more than you're typically comfortable in doing?
If your answer indicates that you feel nervous about letting people get too close, think about that.
To what extent have your experiences led you to believe that you can't trust people with things that matter most to you even when your gut says they're a good bet if given the chance to prove themselves over time?
If any of this applies to you, then think about what it would be like to let go of that burden. For instance, you'd be able to allow people into your life who have your best interests at heart and who bring out the best in you.
This is working under the assumption that you get to know them and honestly give them a chance to get to know you (9 to 12 months) bit by bit and day by day. As you open up to them, you can remove a layer of protection that once kept out pain.
Now that layer of protection is in the way. It's actually causing you pain. In fact, it may be caging you in.
Can you see how a consistent attitude of mistrust may prevent you from experiencing all the love, happiness and stability that good friendships have to offer you?
Imagine you met someone today who seemed pretty decent. You noticed you had some things in common. They were approachable.
In fact, they made it easy for you. They walked up to you and started a conversation. Your instincts said they're a safe bet. The interaction went really well. It made you feel pretty good about yourself. The other person seemed to enjoy it, too.
You started hanging out and discovered even more in common.
This person was really honest with you and had a perspective about things in life that you enjoyed hearing. They made you feel comfortable and respected.
Imagine how it would feel to let them in one level beyond what you would normally allow a new friend. This isn't a physical intimacy. It's emotional - a friendship. Nothing weird or contrived.
It's one level up in trusting that the friendship will continue to deepen and become a source of support and encouragement.
Can you get a mental picture of that? Describe how you would feel and how you think things might go if you let down your guard.
One level up. That's all we're asking.
Will you commit to giving it your very best to push through your mistrust, if this is a problem for you, in order to give someone a break in getting to know you one level beyond what's typical for you?
Where are you going to go to begin your 2.0?
Navitent Name: Day 17_You 2.0
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